Do you have harmonious relationships with all of your close family members and are you aware how this can affect your heart and energy on a daily basis?
People who I looked after that had close family relationships, laughing and joking with their loved ones in hospital would often be full of life and vitality just minutes before they went to bed for the last time, smiling and passing away in their sleep. This was incredible to witness and always gave me hope that death could be a potentially pleasant experience. After all, we all get to die one day – it is only a question of how.
One of the biggest issues that came up repeatedly during my time as a nurse that affected heart health and energy was unresolved family relationships.
I found that much suffering occurred, especially with patients with cancer and heart disease. It is not that issues with family relationships were exclusive to these two areas, just that these are the two illnesses that I had the most experience in dealing with.
I would ask those who suffered the most at the end of their life what their family relationships were like. Without exception, there was always at least one unresolved connection. Conversely, those who experienced virtually no suffering at the end of their lives reported harmonious relationships with all of their family.
Is this a coincidence?
I think not. If you know anyone who is holding a grudge towards a close family member then you can be certain that it is taking a toll on their heart, health, energy and wellbeing. Whilst they may feel that there is nothing that can be done and just soldier on with life, brushing it under the carpet, just one day on an acute medical ward speaking to those who suffer the most about their family relationships would give you conclusive evidence that this was not a good idea.
For anyone holding a grudge towards a family member I would suggest getting professional help to get through it. Otherwise, if you live long enough to die naturally, there will almost certainly be a price to pay.
But you don’t understand Adam…….
I realise that this is no light issue. For those who have suffered violence and/or abuse during their upbringing it is less than easy to let go and forgive family who seemingly position themselves as impossible to love. Reaching resolution in such cases almost always requires professional help. It is not my aim to underplay what has happened in the past.
The purpose of this post is to highlight what may well await those in the future who are currently feeling anger, resentment and/or stuck in the past. What is often hard to accept, until you have seen it for yourself hundreds of times, is that all such feelings affect you more than anyone else and act as poison to your heart, unless resolved.
In the exercise in this video I will take you through a process that can help.
Depending on the depth of the issue this may or may not help. I have found that resolving testing family relationships is not always a quick and easy process. Sometimes it takes time. In this instance it is my aim to plant a seed that will allow you to open yourself to the possibility that one day you may reach a more harmonious resolution that increases the wellness of your heart, your energy and every other relationship in your life.
If you are not ready to resolve your family relationship challenges right now, then I cannot recommend enough the importance of getting professional help for this, or it is likely to slowly drain your life-force away, taking a huge toll on your heart and massively increasing your risk of a heart attack.
The exercise in the following video may not instantly resolve all of your family relationship issues but it will lay a foundation for the path that could lead you to a healthier heart and a more harmonious future in relating to your family.
This is part 6 of The Healthy Heart Academy free e-course. For the other parts leave your name and e-mail in the box on the top, right-hand side of this page.
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Zen and the Art of Heart Maintenance: When was your last heart MOT?
A car is a machine, powered by an engine. It needs regular maintenance for optimum performance. Your heart is your engine. What are you doing to make sure that it’s working properly?
In the UK 1 person dies every 6 minutes of heart disease. Worldwide, 1 person dies at least every 4.5 seconds. Heart disease is the biggest killer on the planet. This is because, unlike car MOTs; heart MOTs are not yet mandatory.
What is a heart MOT?
A test of your heart’s happiness in certain key areas: Your relationships with your friends, your family and yourself. You can do this yourself or may find it easier with someone helping you.
How can I do that?
Through taking time to realise what makes your heart happy, understanding what doesn’t and changing it so that it does. A regular heart MOT is essential for your heart maintenance and can improve your health, your relationships and your life. It can help to free up thoughts that don’t make you feel good and replace them with ones that do.
It’s not just what you think….
Thinking is a sensation of your brain. Feeling is a sensation from your heart.
Your heart has a separate intelligence from your brain. It beats independently of your brain, it sends more signals to your brain than your brain sends back and it is your engine. When you think about your feelings it is easy to get caught in over-analysis.
Negative emotions do not exist.
There is a perception amongst many that you experience both positive and negative emotions. This is a lie. Every emotion that you experience is a moment-to-moment guidance system of how you feel during any given interaction. Having the ability to feel emotions like sadness, anger and hurt is part of Being Human.
If you like a certain moment, enjoy it and repeat it. Just remembering a moment that made you feel good can make you feel good again. Doing this is very good for your heart
An exercise to help add some zen to your heart.
Start by asking what you would like to attract more of in your life right now? Whether you are looking for more love, happiness, freedom, wealth or fun, maybe it’s something completely different, that’s ok. It’s all right to create an image of you having it in the future if you can’t think of a strong enough memory. Whatever would make you feel better quickly; think about it now.
As you think about that memory, recreate the feeling.Stop and do this now.
Thinking of things that make you feel better more often is the fast-track to a healthy heart MOT. The longer that you focus on what you want, the more likely you are of getting it.
Having a healthy heart is about being able to navigate a way to feeling better from even the most challenging of places. The more you practice, the better you get.
Wishing you well on your heart MOT,
P.s Knowing exactly what you want and why you want it is the first step to getting it.
You can get a free healthy heart MOT e-course by leaving your name and e-mail on this page.
The art of a heart to heart can help you to know your heart’s message.
The art of a heart to heart is connecting to something that allows you to access the wisdom of your heart and what message it wants you to know vs what your head is telling you. To do this just sit comfortably, lose any idea of what to expect and take a few minutes out of your day to watch the video below, accompanied by the soothing sounds of Mozart’s Piano Concerto no. 21……
If you liked the art of a heart to heart – know your heart’s message video, please click the Facebook “Like” button below and/or leave your comments……..